Grooveshark

I’ve been a tremendous fan of Jack White’s since I first heard The White Stripes song “Dead Leaves and The Dirty Ground”, and the scope of my adulation has only grown. I’ve strained vocal chords screaming “Black Math” in my car, read every interview I could get my hands on, and more than likely thrown my back out playing air guitar.

With that being said, I was going to meet Jack White even if it found me locked in a New Orleans jailhouse. This proposition proved difficult as not only did I not have a backstage pass, but I have a look that just screams “shouldn’t be back here”. Normally, this is a deal breaker for a lot of people, but one shouldn’t underestimate the incredible power of bribery as it pertains to sneaking backstage.

After loitering creepily by The Raconteurs tour bus, I found someone with a backstage pass who was leaving the grounds. Rather than unabashedly begging him for the pass and finding myself devoid of cash, I simply offered to break the kneecaps of all of his oppressors in exchange for his now obsolete pass. Much to my surprise, he obliged with a laugh and offered me the keys to the proverbial Raconteurs kingdom. With a cheesy grin, I deftly stole through the legions of security guards with a wink and a smile and began planning what kind of sycophantic thing I would say to Jack White.

Then Jude Law intervened. Apparently he loves The Raconteurs just as much as he loves nannies, because his presence was felt in the backstage area. I tried chatting up John C. Reilly, but even he seemed awestruck by the chiseled cheekbones of everyone’s “favorite” A.I. thespian. If I seem bitter, it’s because I am. Jude Law (and John C. Reilly, but he was in Magnolia so it’s excusable) occupied so much time on The Raconteurs tour bus that I had to leave before getting the chance to meet Jack White. What could they have been talking about? Surely Jack White wasn’t pitching his screenplay of Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow 2?

However, I did get to meet Brendan Benson, bassist Patrick Keeler, and drummer Jack Lawrence backstage and found them to be pleasant and cordial. The backstage area resembled everything you would imagine a backstage area in New Orleans would look like: bottles of champagne, canned beer, and a seemingly infinite flow of cigarettes. The Raconteurs are playing a Jack Johnson-ly amount of festivals this summer, so go see them if you can.

Do not, however, go see whatever bland Jude Law movie is coming out this year (crosses fingers for The Holiday 2).

Del.icio.us digg reddit

• Posted in All of The Rest